« | Home | Categories | »

Vatican calls Irish referendum a ‘defeat for humanity’

Posted on May 27th, 2015 at 8:54 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


“This result left me feeling very sad but as the Archbishop of Dublin [Diarmuid Martin] pointed out, the Church will have to take this reality on board in the sense of a renewed and strengthened evangelisation. I believe that we are talking here not just about a defeat for Christian principles but also about a defeat for humanity,” Cardinal Parolin told reporters on the margins of a Centesimus Annus conference in the Vatican.


An what would you call “institutionalized child rape and associated cover-ups”, Cardinal? Tuesday?

Write a comment


  1. Well I think it’s a defeat for the Catholic Church and a heroic victory for humanity. People rarely line up around the block to vote for the status quo*.

    *One of my only bits of Latin. I’m sure the Cardinal is better educated in that way.

Anti-Gay Missouri GOP House Speaker Caught Sexting With Intern

Posted on May 14th, 2015 at 10:08 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


The Kansas City Star today reported that the speaker of the Missouri House, Republican John Diehl, sent several sexually charged text messages to a female college freshman who was working as an intern in the state legislature. Diehl, who is married, has championed the Religious Right’s anti-gay agenda in the state house, and has in turn been praised by state conservative groups for his “moral leadership.”

Earlier this year, Diehl and the president pro-tempore of the state Senate filed an amicus brief in defense of the state’s anti-gay-marriage amendment, leading the Missouri Family Policy Council, the state affiliate of the Family Research Council, to praise the speaker “for demonstrating moral leadership and true integrity in standing up for the sacred institution of marriage and the family values of the people of Missouri.” The state affiliate of the Southern Baptist Convention thanked him for “fighting to defend biblical marriage.”

Write a comment


  1. Ah, another HIC – Hypocrite In Charge!

  2. He might be heterosexual? I’m shocked!

The First Pedophile-Enabling Catholic Bishop Finally Goes Down

Posted on May 12th, 2015 at 11:26 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


I think we’re going to need a wooden stake.


Write a comment


  1. I don’t know if the prosecutor had the option, but Finn should have been charged with a felony, tagged as a sexual predator for enabling such behavior in his subordinates, and spent a good 10 years in stir… All else considered, the Pope should excommunicate Finn. He is a disgrace to the Catholic faith!

  2. The Archbishop of Adelaide, Philip Wilson, was charged with concealing sex abuse back in March as well

  3. I don’t know which is worse. Muslims killing innocents so they can get 72 virgins in heaven or catholic priests buggering 72 virgin altar boys.

Pastor Brags About Escaping Car Accident Unharmed… Even Though Wife Has Spinal Fractures & Needs Neck Brace

Posted on May 12th, 2015 at 10:08 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Last week, evangelist Dr. Phil Kidd and his wife got in a really awful car accident. I’m happy to say they’re both going to be okay (even if the car is totaled). What’s really fascinating, though, is how they’re talking about it.




Maybe Phil’s giant ego functioned as an additional airbag.

Write a comment


  1. She sounds like a lovely person married to a pig. I didn’t know that this was allowed in the U.S.

Surprisingly, Lawsuit Against ‘All Homosexuals’ Summarily Dismissed

Posted on May 8th, 2015 at 11:03 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Here, the plaintiff does not set forth any factual or legal basis for a federal claim under the Constitution, laws, or treaties of the United States. Even construing the complaint liberally, it does not contain allegations reasonably suggesting federal question jurisdiction exists in this matter. Nor can the plaintiff plausibly allege that her citizenship is different from the citizenship of each defendant. And she has not asked for any money damages, much less enough to satisfy the amount-in-controversy requirement of 28 U.S.C. § 1332. Therefore, the Court finds subject-matter jurisdiction is not proper in this action pursuant to either 28 U.S.C. §§ 1331 or 1332.

[..]The Court will not give the plaintiff an opportunity to amend her complaint in this matter because it is obvious that amendment would be futile. Even liberally construed, the plaintiff does not set forth any discernible claim for relief over which this Court has jurisdiction. This Court is not the place to seek opinions regarding theological matters; this particular forum is closed and the case will be dismissed.


Write a comment


  1. Well that’s saved us all a lot of time.

  2. So, basically the judge (bless his heart) told this person “You are an idiot. Stop wasting the court’s time and the people’s money!”. Yeah, I go for that!

Nebraska Woman Sues All Homosexuals

Posted on May 6th, 2015 at 13:58 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Because Jesus:

An Auburn woman calling herself an ambassador for God and his son, Jesus Christ, filed a federal lawsuit Friday against all homosexuals.

Sylvia Driskell, 66, said in the suit that she is petitioning the U.S. District Court of Omaha to be heard “in the matter of homosexuality. Is homosexuality a sin, or not a sin?”

Driskell will be representing herself in the case of (I’m not making this up) Driskell v. Homosexuals.

Because no attorney’s touching this one with a ten-foot pole.

No word yet on who’s representing every gay person ever. Or how they’re all gonna fit inside the courtroom.

Write a comment


  1. It almost makes me ashamed to admit I grew up in Nebraska!

  2. I can’t be the only one who wants to see how far this actually makes it within the system. I suspect that it’ll be laugh-filled the whole way.

  3. Apparently this will be in the system for a long time. An order will be issued “approximately 30 days after the last defendant has answered”.

    If you are a homosexual get on and answer. I want to see the discovery order.


Milledgeville Church Sign Raises Objections

Posted on May 1st, 2015 at 9:28 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


A Milledgeville church known for stating what some would call extreme beliefs, now threatens the lives of gay people.

Robert Owens was just casually riding his bike on North Columbia Street in Milledgeville when he noticed a sign that read “Homesexuality is a Death Worthy Crime.”

“This is the first time that I have ever seen anything that actually crossed the line and was inferring death upon a group,” Owens said.

Having gay family members and friends, Owens says he found the sign to be very offensive.

“If it said being bald or blind or short or fat or blue-eyed or red head, if any of those were death worthy crimes, if they were causing people think “wow those people really need to die” that’s a terrible thing, that’s crossing line,” Owens said.

The person responsible for the sign is Pastor Robert Lee of the Ten Commandments Church.

Lee says he sees nothing wrong with the sign and was just quoting Leviticus 20:13, a scripture in the Bible.

“Homosexuality is an abomination, and the Bible says that homosexuality is a death worthy crime,” Lee said.

The guy probably has a Grindr profile…

Write a comment


  1. Ten commandments? Love thy neighbour? (Or neighbor, for my neighbour’s sake).

  2. And the bible says you should stone your disrespectful children to death. Let’s get going. I’m sure god thinks that cherry-picking his book is an abomination.

Missouri Woman, a Satanist, Will Claim “Religious Freedom” to Get Out of 72-Hour Abortion Waiting Period

Posted on April 30th, 2015 at 15:04 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


This letter constitutes my acknowledgment that you have notified me of the state mandated waiting period, but demands that you do not abide by this obligation because the waiting period offends my sincerely held religious beliefs, which take precedent.


Write a comment


  1. An example of the Law of Unintended Consequences? This actually could be really big!

We are? I was not aware…

Posted on April 29th, 2015 at 14:32 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News

We are? I was not aware...

Write a comment

We cannot eat Bibles: Nepal tells #SoulVultures

Posted on April 28th, 2015 at 17:31 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


More than 100,000 paperback-edition Gideon Bibles have arrived in Nepal to provide relief for the millions of Nepalese desperate for help following the devastating 7.8 magnitude earthquake that has struck the country.But the jet loaded with skids of boxed Bibles was called misguided and “dumber-than-dumb-ass” by rescue groups and world governments alike.The Nepal PM asked, “Do they think Nepal is a Motel?”“We cannot eat Bibles. We cannot use them as shovels.”


Write a comment


  1. i’d like to know who thought it was a good idea to send them, but the link is down.

  2. There are lots of uses for paperbacks, toilet paper for example. Although the Old Testment might be a little harsh for sensitive posteriors

  3. Silly rabbit, toilet paper bibles are only for Americans.

  4. The story was originally published on The Lapine. This is a satirical publication; the story was a fake, meant for laughs.

  5. Poe’s Law strikes again.


Posted on April 27th, 2015 at 18:01 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News

Found this beauty in the Bible Belt last night.

Write a comment


  1. Found this in Whacko Texas or Baptista Alabama I presume?

  2. Can’t these idiots buy decent cars? The message would be better received on a Cadillac. Isn’t that the car most televangelist drive?

Fox priest: ‘Hard to trust’ an atheist president because they don’t fear eternal damnation

Posted on April 27th, 2015 at 9:01 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


“It’s a belief in God, it’s a belief that there are eternal consequences for your actions,” he explained. “And I think that a leader that doesn’t have that — a set of core beliefs that help him to make justice an important part of his life and his decisions because he knows that there are eternal consequences, well, it’s somebody that it’s hard to trust.”

He’s not the first priest who indirectly admits the only reason he doesn’t rape, steal and murder is fear for his imaginary friend. He’s a very sick person.

Write a comment


  1. P.S. Jesus never got involved in politics!

  2. You are more likely (imo) to get behaviour that takes account of the future of the planet and its inhabitants from someone who doesn’t believe in sky-fairies or Ragnaroks or whatever. Not that I think that this person believes in all that.

Pastor rants against another anti-gay pastor — because the second pastor doesn’t support killing gays.

Posted on April 17th, 2015 at 13:36 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News

And yet he cuts his hair, shaves his beard, wears clothes of different fabrics and works on Sunday…

But you know what, my gaydar beeps very loudly with this guy…

Write a comment


  1. Isn’t there a law against incitement to murder? Why isn’t this a-hole in jail right now?

Biologists Confirm God Evolved From Chimpanzee Deity

Posted on April 13th, 2015 at 14:22 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Challenging long-held views on the origins of divinity, biologists at the University of California, Berkeley, presented findings Thursday that confirm God, the Almighty Creator of the Universe, evolved from an ancient chimpanzee deity.

The recently discovered sacred ancestor, a divine chimp species scientists have named Pan sanctorum, reportedly gave rise over millions of years to the Lord Our God, Maker of Heaven and Earth.

“Although perhaps not obvious at first glance, there are actually overwhelming similarities between the Supreme Being of today and this early primate deity who preceded Him,” said Dr. Richard Kamen, a leading biologist who also heads Berkeley’s paleotheology department. “The holy chimp moved around on all fours, but its descendants eventually began walking upright to expend less energy while foraging across the infinite reaches of the universe. This of course led to the bipedalism of modern-day God.”

Write a comment


  1. So, the original forbidden fruit was the banana?

Pope Francis Personally Rejected Gay French Ambassador

Posted on April 11th, 2015 at 13:24 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


“On 29 July 2013, the pope created a real enthusiasm in the gay community, who concluded Pope Francis was definitely more “friendly” than his predecessors when, on the plane to Rio, he made the comment, “If a person is gay, and sought the Lord with good will, who am I to judge?”

“France has just discovered the hard way that softening has its limits. It was “a decision by the pope himself,” a source inside the Vatican told Le Journal du Dimanche. The letter from the Archbishop of Paris, Cardinal André Vingt-Trois, which was presented to the Pope on February 11, which brought together Cardinals asking him to accept the French ambassador has not changed his decision. Jean-Louis Tauran, the Camerlengo of the Holy Church, also interceded on behalf of Stefanini. In vain. The pope told several cardinals he would not yield.”

Write a comment


  1. About time all this “Ambassador to the Vatican” stuff was stopped, imo.

  2. They are probably looking for a pedo rather than a homo.


Posted on April 6th, 2015 at 10:19 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News

Okay, I slept late, so I missed it guys… Did Jesus see his shadow this morning?

Write a comment


  1. Yes he did, and that means six more years of Christians claiming “persecution” for not being allowed to discriminate. B

  2. He must have. It was a lovely, sunny day – today, not so much. I guess a cloud must have crossed over the sun while he was checking it out. 🙂

  3. Is it too late to do the “Put me up for the weekend” joke again?

Mike Pence: There’s an Internet conspiracy to make Indiana seem like anti-gay bigots

Posted on March 31st, 2015 at 0:47 by John Sinteur in category: Boo hoo poor you, Pastafarian News


“I understand that there’s been a tremendous amount of misinformation and misunderstanding around this bill, and I’m just determined — and I appreciate the time on your program — I’m just determined to clarify this,” Pence told ABC’s George Stephanopolous.

“So this is a yes or no question,” the ABC host noted. “Is Advance America right when they say a florist in Indiana can now refuse to serve a gay couple without fear of punishment?”

Pence, however said that the purpose of the bill that he signed was to “empower” religious people.

And this was a pattern that would be repeated over the next 20 minutes: Stephanopolous asking if the bill allowed anti-LGBT discrimination, followed by Pence dodging the question.

There’s an internet conspiracy to make all anti-gay bigots look like anti-gay bigots, not just Indiana.

It’s called “The internet can be used to do research and report news.”

Write a comment


  1. Religion, the father of all discrimination.

  2. Most of these fanatic ‘Anti-Gay’ lobbyists are gays themselves. Once in a while they get caught……

    There used to be a topic ‘If you’re in marketing, kill yourself’, can’t we extend it to ‘If you’re in marketing or a lobbyist, kill yourself’?

  3. @Yooo… now that you mention it, they do seem very “happy”. What is it about forbidden sex?

  4. Why not make it so that for a business to be able to have this apply, they have to change their name to include something like Christian, Baptist, etc. If they are going to run their company as it is an individual with religious rights, customers and employees should know that it is a for-profit company that applies a religious standard to everything. Then customers and suppliers can determine if they want to go there or not. Then the owners can determine which is more important, religion or capitalism.

  5. As an ardent follower of Matthew 6:6 it would place an undue burden on my business if the government forced me to do that Brian!

Priest sparks outrage at Melbourne primary school over comments relating to Jill Meagher’s rape and murder

Posted on March 28th, 2015 at 14:01 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


A Catholic priest has sparked outrage at a primary school in Melbourne’s west over controversial comments he made about Jill Meagher’s death at an end-of-term service.

The priest reportedly held up a newspaper with Adrian Bayley’s face on it, before mentioning rape and murder to students, staff and about 100 other parishioners at St Christopher’s Primary School at Airport West on Friday.

The 3AW Drive program, presented by Tom Elliott, was told the priest then said that if Ms Meagher had been “more faith-filled” she “would have been home in bed” and “not walking down Sydney Rd at 3am” when she was raped and murdered by Bayley in September 2012.

Why do you never see one of these asshats say something like “if the rapist had been more faith-filled he would have been home in bed and not walking down Sydney Rd at 3am to rape her”?

Write a comment


  1. Is it time yet to just give up on organized religion? At the very least, it should have warnings on it like cigarettes.

  2. @Chas – I like the idea of cigarette warning: “Following organized religion leads to severe stupidity and sheepish behavior. Habitual religious partaking can lead to you becoming cannon fodder and eventual death”

    Next, we need to address the issue of illness and death caused by second hand religious contact.

Muslim students sue medical univ. over male/female physical exams

Posted on March 25th, 2015 at 17:24 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Two Muslim students have filed a case against Erasmus MC at the Board of Appeal for Higher Education in the Hague. Erasmus MC would not give these female students exemption for a practical part of the course practical clinical skills in which they would have to participate in a physical examination conducted by other students, AD reports.


“The students also have to experience how an examination feels for a patient. That promotes understanding.” Drexhage told the newspaper. According to him, students are aware that this component is required during enrollment.

Write a comment


  1. Bye Bye. Leave standards as they are and fail to let her become a doctor. Better off for the population. What’s next, an exemption for giving vaccines because of religious objections? Strikes me religion has become the excuse du jour for all sorts of anti social behaviors and out right laziness and stupidity. Oh wait, I guess “du jour” is wrong, it has always been that way.

  2. Religious people are stupid people, and they act stupid. So what’s the big surprise here?

Pope Francis Credited With Performing ‘Miracle’ As St. Gennaro’s Blood Liquifies

Posted on March 25th, 2015 at 17:22 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Pope Francis is being credited with a miracle — or at least a “half miracle” — after St. Gennaro’s blood liquified in his presence in Naples on Saturday.

The saint’s blood is usually dry inside of its sealed glass ampoule. However, after the pope kissed the relic, it began to turn to liquid.

“It is the sign that St. Gennaro loves Pope Francis: half of the blood turned to liquid,” Cardinal Crescenzo Sepe, archbishop of Naples, told the cheering crowd, according to Vatican Insider.

This property is called thixotrophy. See: The Blood of St. Januarius.

Even though this natural behavior is well documented, the blood of St. Gennaro is still hyped as “unexplained”.

Write a comment


  1. So, are we going to end up with another St. Francis? How confusing will that be? Will GOD be able to tell which you are praying to? 🙂

  2. Or, in other words, a conjuring trick.

  3. Will David Copperfield become a saint also?

Fire kills 7 children at home in New York – CNN.com

Posted on March 21st, 2015 at 18:14 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


“This is an unbelievable tragedy,” New York Mayor Bill de Blasio told reporters Saturday about a fire that killed seven children and seriously injured their mother and the children’s teenage sister in Brooklyn.

“It’s so painful, it’s so difficult . … Every New Yorker is feeling this pain right now,” de Blasio said after touring the site with fire officials early Saturday afternoon.

New York fire Commissioner Daniel Nigro said that, from what he can tell, the fire would have made it “impossible” for the mother to have left her second-floor room to collect her children in other rooms on the floor, Nigro said.


A “hot plate” keeping food warm in a kitchen overnight apparently started a fire that killed seven children in two-story house in Brooklyn early Saturday, New York City’s fire commissioner said.


The family apparently had been trying to keep food warm with a “hot plate” device, and an unspecified malfunction happened, Nigro said.

Nigro was asked why food was being warmed overnight.

“I believe it’s the Sabbath, and people keep food warm that way. They don’t have to operate a stove,” Nigro answered.

Stupid religious rules cause yet more death and suffering.

Write a comment


  1. It’s unfortunate that people pay attention to what any religion says.

  2. A defective electrical device was the cause, not actually religion.

  3. except that electrical device would not even have been there if it weren’t for the “no work on sabbath” rules and their stupid silly loopholes

  4. I’m with Sue. The religion-hating is sometimes a bit overboard, John.

  5. I’m with John. The heater is an inanimate object. It’s tragically inappropriate use was motivated by lunatic religious beliefs and their consequent customs. QED.

  6. Yes, give religion a break. It’s only been crammed down people’s throats forever. It deserves a rest from criticism.

    Let’s criticize the government instead. That’s politically correct.

  7. I am with no body – actually it was the lack of smoke detectors (only on the basement) that is the culprit. If they had these, then they would have been warned as it smoldered for a while before taking off. That said, leaving a cooking appliance on unattended is batshit insane. (As an aside, where was the all knowing and loving god where hear so much about ….oh, wait, of course, god had some all knowing loving reason to take the lives and bring so much hurt on the surviving relatives.)

  8. All true; can’t really argue with all of that.

    It’s Spring, everyone. Change your smoke and CO detector batteries…

  9. I blame physics. If the flames of a fire would not be so hot and smoky, there would have not been any victims.

Catholic Church Claims It Can Refuse To Pay Victims Of Sex Abuse Because Of Religious Freedom

Posted on March 12th, 2015 at 11:11 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


The Catholic Archdiocese of Milwaukee sought to insulate $55 million of its funds from lawsuits brought by victims of priestly sex abuse, according to a letter penned by then-Archbishop of Milwaukee Timothy Dolan, so it transferred those funds into a separate trust set up to care for the archdiocese’s cemeteries and mausoleums. Once the sexual abuse victims sought those funds in a bankruptcy proceeding, however, the archdiocese claimed that it had a religious liberty right not to use that money to compensate victims of abuse.


At least 45 Milwaukee priests face allegations of sexual abuse, including one priest who was accused of molesting close to 200 deaf boys. The cemetery trust was created after the archdiocese agreed to a $17 million settlement involving ten victims who alleged that they were abused by priests in California, but the $55 million worth of funds were not transferred to that trust until after a Wisconsin Supreme Court decision which allowed other lawsuits by alleged victims of priestly abuse to move forward. Dolan, who is now a cardinal and the Archbishop of New York, wrote to the Vatican regarding the $55 million in funds that “[b]y transferring these assets to the Trust, I foresee an improved protection of these funds from any legal claim and liability.”

The archdiocese declared bankruptcy in 2011, in part due to the financial burden of the lawsuits brought by alleged abuse victims.

Write a comment


  1. Words fail me. Freedom to Bugger?

  2. This is one of the reasons the “Catholic” Church should lose its tax-exempt status as a religious institution.

Bishop: Wrong for woman to ‘get back’ at rapists with abortion

Posted on March 10th, 2015 at 9:16 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Catholic Bishop Dr Kevin Doran has said it is wrong for a woman to get back at a rapist by having an abortion.

Yeah, because it really hurts the rapists having an abortion, and surely no other possible reason could motivate women to abort such a pregnancy.

Of course, forced marriage with the rapist is the only reasonable option, but only if her father still owns her. If he’s already sold her to her husband, you’ll have to execute her.

Write a comment


  1. There are far too many men in beards and dresses telling women what to do or what not to do.

  2. Remind me when Catholics were last in the news for advocating forced marriage to a rapist?

  3. [Roman Catholic views on the Bible’s infallability and inerrancy]:

    Absolute inerrancy: Some Catholic theologians have claimed that, in its original autograph version, the Bible is inerrant — without error. This appears to be the consensus of popes, of most of the Catholic scholars and of other church leaders until the mid 20th century. This belief developed naturally from their conviction that God inspired the authors of the Bible. If God controlled the writers’ words directly or indirectly, then he would not have led them into error. Deceit and error are not normally attributes expected of God.

  4. @Desiato – remind me the last time the Catholic church came in support of abortion in case of rape or incest?

  5. @SueW – more broadly, There are too many in beards and dresses telling everyone what to do

Sam Harris rips academics who ceaselessly deny that religion can inspire brutal violence

Posted on March 5th, 2015 at 22:25 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


“No one doubts the political and economic justifications that people give for their behavior. When someone says, ‘Listen, I murdered my rich neighbor because I knew he kept a pile of money in a safe. I wanted that money, and I didn’t want to leave a witness,’ nobody looks for an ulterior explanation for that behavior,” he said.

“But when someone says, ‘I think infidels and apostates deserve to burn in hell, and I know for a fact that I’ll go to paradise if I die while waging jihad against them,’ many academics refuse to accept this rationale at face value and begin looking for the political or economic reasons that they imagine lie beneath it. So the game is rigged.”

The reason those academics refuse to believe the statements of a believer is that they are too committed to their secular understanding of the world to fully comprehend the power of belief.

But “once you imagine what it would be like to actually believe in paradise, and in martyrdom as the surest way of getting there, it becomes obvious why someone would want to join the Islamic State. If a person truly believes that the Creator of the universe wants him to wage war against the evil of unbelief and that the Islamic State is the very tip of His spear, he has to be insane not to join the cause.”

“I see no reason to think that most jihadis are psychologically abnormal,” Harris said. “The truth is far more depressing: These are mostly normal people — fully capable of love, empathy, altruism, and so forth — who simply believe what they say they believe.”

“The fact that most jihadis are generally rational, even psychologically normal, and merely in the grip of a dangerous belief system is, in my view, the most important point to get across.”

“It is amazing how resolutely people will ignore the evidence of this,” he concluded. “Justin Bieber could convert to Islam tomorrow, spend a full hour on 60 Minutes confessing his hopes for martyrdom and his certainty of paradise, and then join the Islamic State — and Glenn Greenwald would still say his actions had nothing to do with the doctrine of Islam and everything to do with U.S. foreign policy.”

Write a comment


  1. How about it’s to do with the doctrine of Islam and U.S. foreign policy?

  2. It’s almost like we give them purpose by just being there. Maybe we need a policy change. My solution: Quarantine and Ignore. If someone wants to go there, it’s their problem.

  3. @Chas – Quarantine and Ignore? Didn’t work in Afghanistan. Will not work now. When someone believes that holy war should stop only when all believe as they do, well I need not say the consequences. I am for mandates that simply outlaw all forms organized worship of any sort. Do it in private. In the end it is an individual decision. Born alone, die alone.

  4. @Mykolas – an unholy war then?

  5. @Chas – unholy war? Wait, that isn’t that current U.S. Foreign Policy in the Middle East? Does not seem to doing much good. War does not effect what is needed: Education. Educate that the fairy tales for which you kill and die are just that, fairy tales. Of course, much much easier said than done.

  6. Take the Holy out of them? They rejected educated though a thousand years ago, because it wasn’t consistent with their religion.

  7. Yeah, you are correct on that point. Really not many good choices. “Ring fence and let em kill each other” (Quarantine and Ignore) takes a military commitment to enforce. Stopping the arms flow would be a good start, but then the world’s arms makers (merchants of death) would lobby against that.

Islamic State are religious perverts, just like IRA: Catholic cardinal

Posted on March 5th, 2015 at 14:19 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


One of the world’s leading Catholics has said he sees a close parallel between Islamic State and the IRA.

Well, if there’s one organization that knows a lot about religious perverts, it’s the Catholic Church..

Write a comment


  1. Actually he was saying perversion of religion to further their goals. Oh wait, I guess the goal can he anything, boys, killing infidels, undermining governments. Oh never mind.

“Be Careful With Mohammed”: Muslim Action Forum launches “legal strategy” to stop publication of insults to Mohammed

Posted on March 4th, 2015 at 19:47 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


The Muslim Action Forum (MAF), which staged a protest outside Downing Street against Charlie Hebdo in February, has launched a “legal strategy” to stop insults against Mohammed.

The organisation is also asking supporters to “lobby your MP” to make “Islamophobia” a criminal offence.

They state that they intend “to launch a series of legal challenges in the English Court system” because “depictions of our Holy Prophet peace be upon Him is the worst kind of ‘Hate Crime’ that can be perpetrated on the 3 million Muslims in the UK and 1.7 billion Muslims worldwide.”

So they are using your fairy tales to kill women, atheists, gays, and who knows what else in about half the countries where that filth has taken root, and the DARE claim that silly pictures of their precious pedophile are the worst kind of hate crime?

Go fuck yourselves.

Write a comment


  1. I couldn’t agree more with the conclusion

  2. “Cut off their nuts!”

  3. Hey why stop there MAF? Call in the thought police while your at it. Give every suspect a polygraph test! Go f_ck yourself indeed.

  4. The last sentence, just three words long, is the best response to MAF. Thank you.

‘Pro Life’ GOPer Says It’s Fine For Kids to Die in the Name of God

Posted on February 27th, 2015 at 16:55 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


In a deeply religious section of Idaho, a Republican state representative says that the state has no right to protect children from their parents who refuse them needed medical treatment in favor of faith healing.

“Children do die,” says Rep. Christy Perry. And it’s fine with her if Idaho children die in the name of God. Perry’s district includes many followers of a religious cult, Followers of Christ, that eschews medicine. She says that the sect’s members are more comfortable confronting death when it happens to their children.

“I’m not trying to sound callous, but [people calling for reform] want to act as if death is an anomaly. But it’s not. It’s a way of life,” she says.


On her website, Perry ironically proclaims that she’s “a pro life mother and grandmother and emphasizes her honor and value of all human life, born and unborn.” Perry also claims she’s “an ardent supporter of defending each child’s right to life.”

Terminating am embryo without a nervous system or therefore the ability to feel pain: worst thing in the world. Letting your grown child suffer slowly and die from an easily preventable disease: perfectly OK and within parents rights. Got it.

Perhaps we should declare all abortions to be done in the Name of God. After all, the bible has explicit instructions on how to perform abortions.

Write a comment

What ISIS Really Wants

Posted on February 18th, 2015 at 20:02 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


The reality is that the Islamic State is Islamic. Very Islamic. Yes, it has attracted psychopaths and adventure seekers, drawn largely from the disaffected populations of the Middle East and Europe. But the religion preached by its most ardent followers derives from coherent and even learned interpretations of Islam.

Virtually every major decision and law promulgated by the Islamic State adheres to what it calls, in its press and pronouncements, and on its billboards, license plates, stationery, and coins, “the Prophetic methodology,” which means following the prophecy and example of Muhammad, in punctilious detail. Muslims can reject the Islamic State; nearly all do. But pretending that it isn’t actually a religious, millenarian group, with theology that must be understood to be combatted, has already led the United States to underestimate it and back foolish schemes to counter it. We’ll need to get acquainted with the Islamic State’s intellectual genealogy if we are to react in a way that will not strengthen it, but instead help it self-immolate in its own excessive zeal.

Write a comment

S.F. archbishop’s imposition of morality clause at schools outrages many

Posted on February 13th, 2015 at 13:43 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


San Francisco Archbishop Salvatore J. Cordileone sparked a protest last summer when he ignored pleas from public officials to cancel his plans to march in Washington, D.C., against same-sex marriage.

Now Cordileone has prompted fresh outrage in the liberal Bay Area by imposing morality clauses on teachers, staff and administrators at the four high schools under his control in San Francisco, Marin and San Mateo counties.

A newly released handbook asks the nearly 500 school employees to “affirm and believe” that “adultery, masturbation, fornication, the viewing of pornography and homosexual relations” are “gravely evil.” Artificial-reproductive technology, contraception and abortion are described similarly.


Cordileone’s stand has elicited opposition at the high schools, especially from students, who have taken to Twitter with the hashtag #teachacceptance and on Monday wore white in solidarity with teachers.

Listen guys, here’s an idea. How about you write up a list of everything wrong with the church and then maybe nail it to the front door of their church so everyone can read it.

Write a comment

Report: Leading Cause Of Death In U.S. Is God Needing Another Angel

Posted on February 13th, 2015 at 13:12 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News

Write a comment

« Older Entries