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White House Denies CIA Teleported Obama to Mars

Posted on January 1st, 2013 at 13:57 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane -- Write a comment


Forget Kenya. Never mind the secret madrassas. The sinister, shocking truth about Barack Obama’s past lies not in east Africa, but in outer space. As a young man in the early 1980s, Obama was part of a secret CIA project to explore Mars. The future president teleported there, along with the future head of Darpa.

That’s the assertion, at least, of a pair of self-proclaimed time-traveling, universe-exploring government agents. Andrew D. Basiago and William Stillings insist that they once served as “chrononauts” at Darpa’s behest, traversing the boundaries of time and space. They swear: A youthful Barack Obama was one of them.

I’m not saying Obama is an extraterrestrial, but has anyone seen his earth certificate? Study it out people!

  1. Is it a slow news day today, Jon?

    The whole Birther Issue was valid reporting (the reporting of the crazy people who thought Obama was born in Kenya, that is) but teleportation? The interwebs are full of nonsense. By all means, link to the funny stuff laughing at the crazy people who believe the nonsense but linking to the nonsense itself?

  2. What’s amazing to me is that there are those who would believe this cruft! :rolleyes:

  3. The thing I find interesting is why such an incarnation of Mr. O. would want to come back and do something as useless and thankless as POUSA.

    But you’re the Spaceman, so I defer to your expertise.

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